A Wife’s View

I have a treat for you today.  My guest post comes to you courtesy of Cat, a fellow sub wife.  Sometimes I feel like sub wives are few and far between so I love finding them.  I can relate to what she has written on so many levels!  I hope you enjoy her guest post.  

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Cat is a Navy submariner’s wife and new mom to baby Cora.  She spends her time breastfeeding, cloth diapering, singing, baking, volunteering, and blogging about these adventures and others at Cartwheels & Windmills.  Her husband is separating from active military service very soon.




Hi everyone!  I’m Cat, and I love reading Poe’s blog because of our many similarities.  Just like Poe, my husband and I are not from the same state, so there is no mutual “home” to return to when he separates from this Navy lifestyle next month.  And unlike Poe, we don’t plan on staying where the Navy has landed us.  While our current home of Pensacola, Florida, may be touted as “the Cradle of Naval Aviation,” it certainly is not “the Cradle of High-paying Jobs for Former Submarine Officers.”  So instead of those options, we are treating this almost like another PCS, just with more control, more money spent out of our own pockets, and about the same amount of stress.

My husband’s job search has been a big adventure, but I, personally, have very little to do with it.  So instead I want to focus on what his military separation means to me.  For one, I can only call myself a Navy submariner’s wife for just a few more months. It all goes away August 31.   For the past few years, I’ve let his military service define our relationship and also myself.  I met him after he had already joined, so immediately I was a Navy girlfriend, then I “got promoted” to Navy wife, a milspouse, a subwife, etc.  What will I be now?  A veteran’s wife?  (But wasn’t he already a veteran while on active duty??)  A Reservist’s wife?  (Actually, we flip-flop a lot about him going that route.)  A former milspouse?  (Doesn’t that sound like we got divorced?)  I guess it’s not the best idea to define yourself in terms of someone else, but when your primary roles are wife and mother, it’s hard not to do precisely that.  Since there are at least a billion other women with the “wife and mother” title in this world, it’s nice to find a niche.  Many define themselves as a “crunchy momma” or a “Christian mother”—perhaps I will adopt a moniker along those lines.

Aside from a change in title, what else does this military separation mean for me?  Well, for one, a slight loss of security.  A lot of military spouses might say they feel insecure about certain things, like moving dates, deployments, and the like.  But there is stability to this lifestyle.  There are family support centers, financial assistance programs, and a community of people in the exact same situation as you.  There are rules, standards, and reasons that make life easier.  In my husband’s job, he generally doesn’t have to question someone’s motives, and dishonesty and corruption are reprimanded accordingly.  My husband currently cannot get fired on a whim, leaving us without income or insurance at the drop of a hat.  Wrongful termination, harassment, embezzlement--this kind of stuff happens in the civilian world, often being covered up or with a lot of finger-pointing.  Other jobs normally don’t require each employee to take an oath before their first day, so that stability is now lost.

This separation also means a possible forever home.  I know many who would love to stay in one place, but I’m not sure I’m one of those people.  The Navy actually kind of put a damper on my nomadic lifestyle.  I moved to Jacksonville, FL, on my own after finishing college in my home state of Georgia.  I had originally planned on checking out life as a west coaster and perhaps even trying another country for a bit.  However, I met my husband that year and decided to move to Norfolk, VA, to be near him.  As much as we tried to make the west coast or another country happen, the Navy had other plans for us.  I have officially spent my whole life living below the Mason-Dixon Line and east of the Mississippi.  And now we’re trying to keep it that way, since our families are in that vicinity.  To be honest, it kind of freaks me out.  But at the same time, I’m excited to settle in somewhere for real and even buy a house after a bit.  (Don’t pity us too much, as we have had the opportunity to travel both in and out of the country, and I hope for that to continue.)

As much as I’m looking forward to never having to deal with another underway, deployment, or duty night ever again, there are a few perks of this lifestyle that I will miss. My top three: a free gym, commissary shopping, and free healthcare.  If you’re a milspouse, never ever take any of those for granted (especially that last one, just trust me).  Even though I will miss these things, I am ready to move on and start our civilian life!

What would you miss about military life?

Civilian Again

As of today, The Man is a civilian.  He is no longer apart of the Active Duty Navy.  He’s now a Veteran, one who proudly served his country.  Thank you baby, for your service.  I am so proud of you!

The Man served one enlistment, almost 5 years.  We met about 6 months into his enlistment.  I was there when he graduated sub school on September 11, 2008.  I remember being so proud of him that day.  Then he moved to the PNW and joined his boat.  He deployed with them for a WESTPAC and earned his dolphins in record time.  We were married two months after he returned from deployment and we moved me to the PNW.  From there, life settled into a routine, with his boat being in the shipyard.  Being in the yards did mean long hours but at least he was home just about every night.

In a way, I was spoiled since the boat was in the yard.  There was no regular underway/deployment schedule but we did have a few separations for school and TDY to work on quals.  Sea trials came and went as did an underway.  Nothing too big to complain about though.  We did deal with LOTS of schedule changes but no more than any other milfamily. 

Even though the last year and a half has been challenging for other reason, The Man’s time in the Navy has been good to us.  Neither of us regret his time in.  We were able to buy a house, The Man was able to get help through SARP, Munchkin got excellent care through out my pregnancy and delivery and The Man is going to be able to get a degree using his benefits. 

We got married thinking he would make this a career.  We didn’t come to this decision to get out lightly.  We though about it for a long time and prayed hard.  We talked and talked and talked some more about it.  The idea of getting out made me nervous but over time I gained peace about it.  Now I’m excited that he’s out.  I would have been more than willing to hold down the fort for more underways and deployments and to move where ever they sent us.  I’d be lying though if I said I’m glad I don’t have to do any of that now.  We’re excited that he’s going to be home for the important days…and the everyday things too.  He’s going to get to watch Munchkin grow up.  We’re not going to have to plan her sibling around a deployment schedule. 

The Man is excited to be a civilian again.  He’s been a civilian longer than in the military.  It’s going to be a transition but one that we are so excited for. 

You did babe.  You did a great job and finished strong.  I’m so proud of you!

Homemade Baby Food

   

I have another guest post for you today.  Megan is going to be sharing how she makes baby food from scratch, something I'm hoping to do.  Thanks so much for taking over my blog for the day Megan!

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Hey there! Poekitten asked me to write up a little blurb for her awesome readers, while she is out having a baby, and stuff! So hey! My name is Megan and I blog over at The Memoirs of Megan. My husband got out the Navy back in 2009, and we have finally settled back in his home state of Colorado. It's a big change for this Southern California gal! I write about my daily family life, and anything else that pops into my head, which is usually fairly random. Thanks for having me!

I love looking back into the parent that I thought that I would be, once upon a time. I never dreamed that I would be a breastfeeding advocate type, or a cloth diapering type, or an organic baby food making type. Most of my decisions start off with money, I have to admit. Formula is crazy expensive. Hence why (initially) I was so pro-breastfeeding. (Now, I couldn't imagine feeding my child anything else. It's been so special for us.) I had a major case of sticker shock the other day when I had to go buy a pack of diapers at Target. (Usually, we order them subscription from amazon.com, so I never really noticed how expensive they are. I have a bad habit of thinking that money is more like monopoly money when I purchase things from the internet.) So I ended up purchasing cloth diapers right away, after that whole fiasco.

 But one thing was always clear to me, I was going to make my own baby food. Now, I don't have anything against feeding a baby something from a jar, don't get me wrong. The important thing is checking the ingredients with jarred foods, as many times baby food companies put many forms of artificial ingredients/preservatives/food coloring/"vitamins" into baby food. I have found some really great organic baby food companies, however, a typical "meal" consisting of a jar (many come in plastic packs or pouches now) usually will cost upwards to $1.25 per item! Times that by the three times a day she eats, and that's looking pretty pricey. So I will take you through my process of making baby food, for a fraction of the cost.

 


Step one: Read up! Educate yourself to know about nutritional components of certain foods. Many times frozen veggies are an awesome option available, if you don't have fresh produce available. I HIGHLY suggest this book, it's amazing. It tells you the Top 20 fruits/veggies that you should always buy organic. It also has a ton of really awesome combo recipes for once your baby is at that point.

 


Step Two: Prep time. Have your plan of attack ready. I will typically "bang out" 5-6 different fruits and veggies at one time, and have enough food servings in the fridge/freezer to last her about 2-3 weeks. I also love my Baby Bullet, though any food processor will work. Give yourself plenty of time to do this. Have your husband watch the baby for a while- nothing sucks more than having a baby who is screaming louder than the food processor.

Step Three: Delivery. It took a while for me to be "ok" with the fact that my daughter hates certain foods. For example, I've been photobombing you with my beautiful peas. What I won't show you is my daughter making a horrible gag face and *literally* grabbing the spoon and throwing it on the floor. She HATES peas. And you know what? That's ok. Lesson learned, don't make 2 weeks worth of peas without a trial-run first. It hurt my cheap soul to dump the peas down the drain after the first week of her hating them

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Step Four: Having the right equipment to make it as portable as possible was key for me. Being able to throw a serving of food in my diaper bag was key, because I am all about convenience. That's why making a batch and separating them into smaller servings is super important to me, and having this be a successful thing in my house. So these are just some things that I think about: $1.25/jar x 3 meals a day x appx 6 months of feeding "baby food" = $675 total. So far, I have spent about $100 total, and she's been eating food for 4 months. And there is one huge ingredient that comes in my purely organic baby food that Gerbers doesn't have: love.

Have you made your own baby food? 

Was it a fun experience, or something you'd rather never do again?

Is this something you'd see yourself possibly doing?  

Thoughts on Breastfeeding

I have another wonderful blogger for you today!  Please give Rheanna a warm Many Waters welcome (in the form of lots of comments!)  She’s going to share some thoughts on breastfeeding with us. I found her words to be encouraging and I hope you do too!

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Hi everyone, my name is Rheanna and I blog at Cammo Style Love.  I'm an Air Force wife, married in August of 2004. I have three children and we are now East Coasters! I'm a SAHM that likes to watching black and white movies, reading books and crocheting. I'm a total history nerd, which makes living in the greater DC Metro Area a dream come true! I'm also a mom that struggled with breastfeeding.


You know, you dream of having your kids. You think of their names, what they might look like and just how much fun a little snuggly baby is. I did all those things. I thought of how my pregnancy would go, what my delivery would be like and how I would breastfeed. Being an all natural mama wasn't my thing. I appreciated those that went natural in their childbirth, but it wasn't a conviction I had. For the most part that wasn't an issue. Of course, as with all things people felt the need to tell me how they felt and that was fine. I spent time being totally annoyed internally but whatever, to each his own and I tried not to let it bother me. Breastfeeding on the other hand was something that was important to me. It was a conviction and I totally expected everything to be fine. I heard plenty of things about how its wonderful and how good it is for the baby, breast is best, formula is evil and the like. Stuff I'm sure everyone has probably heard. What I didn't hear was the struggles people have. People had told me that they didn't like it, or they didn't want to, but NO ONE spent any kind of time talking about it being a struggle to do.

And then it was. I had inverted nipples, which made latch hard. Not just hard, but HAAAARRRDDD! It hurt, it bled, I cried it was horrible. I kept hearing over and over in my head, "if you're doing it right it won't hurt." And so the downward spiral began. I was doing it wrong, I couldn't do it, what was I doing. Do you see all those "I's" in there? It was a Rheanna Beat Down. Bawling my eyes out in the hospital from exhaustion, and emotions and frustration, was not how I imagined that I would be spending my time post baby.

So, I forfeited. It was only a partial forfeit, but in my head it was a complete one. A failure, that's what I was. All those people that had made their opinions known before I had my son, were there now making those same opinions known loud and clear. And why I could only hear them when I had other people that were so loving to me, including my dear sweet husband, I have no idea. It isn't until you have an issue that you suddenly meet people and learn that other people you know have had that same issue! I couldn't believe it and I began to get slightly more encouraged. We weren't alone out there. I ended up going 100% formula when Brian was about two months old. Fast forward about two years to baby number two. Again, I heard the normal "opinions" being shared. It was easier this time around, but still hard. I got a super de duper pump and pumped and pumped. A friend also shared fenugreek with me.
 
I made it six months! Even still, the things people say will never cease to amaze me. I still believe that most of the mean words came from a place of total ignorance. They don't know, they've never been
there. If they were or had been, they might have kinder and gentler words to say. If you can believe it I actually had people say to me, "Well, you weren't trying hard enough." Those words just cut me to to the quick. One of my all time favorite things was when someone said, "I just can't imagine how God could let that happen?" In reference to my inability to feed my child. Do I really have to argue this point?

Now baby number 3 is 7 months and I'm still breastfeeding more than 50% of the time. I know that I could have done it 100% of the time if I didn't let the stress of things get to me. This time I combined fenugreek with the amazing Mother's Milk tea and saw a huge improvement in my milk supply! I was more focused and dedicated. It hurt less when I started out, which helped. Most importantly I was strong within myself. I really could care less what anyone has to say. I still get a little mad and frustrated when I hear people say stupid things, but it doesn't get me down. Spending my time talking about breastfeeding in a "realistic and encouraging way" has become a focus for me. We have to stick together. Being uplifting and encouraging, and circling the wagons if you will, is the way to be as far as I'm concerned. Maybe the thing isn't the breastfeeding, or the natural childbirth, or the epidural or the formula. Maybe its the fact that women, and mother's have become so divisive. We aren't supportive or encouraging. The rise of the Green Movement and stores like Whole Foods, and the trendiness of it all and the "coolness" of it has, in my ever humble opinion, made things worse. Instead of just letting people be responsible for themselves, everyone is in everyone else's business.

If someone feels strongly about something they feel the need to not only act upon this for themselves but shove it down every one else's throat. You find it in everything - anti formula, anti-disposables, breastfeeding, cloth diapering, natural child birth, healthy eating, no parabens. Its become crazy! Instead of focusing on what brings us together, our children, we've become too focused on all those other things and are becoming more and more at odds with each other. The other day I heard a lady going on and on about cloth diapers and how its so much better for baby because of the toxins and the chemicals and all that good stuff. Found out later, she never breastfed and didn't want to. Fine by me, you do what you want to do. But it was the way she said it. She was so focused on the lecture of chemicals in the diapers that it was confusing to someone who had heard the lecture of the evils of formula. I’m cloth diapering, and I had been turned off by it for so long by the lectures and the intensity of people that I never even wanted to spend time looking at it. It was the kind, loving, every day normal conversations with a dear friend that led me to make the change to cloth. It was the kind and loving words of my husband and another friend that helped me keep trying the breastfeeding with each baby.

I am proud to say that I am a cloth diapering, breastfeeding, baby wearing mama who goes to McDonalds and has a slight addiction to Dr. Pepper. But shouldn't that be okay? Should that divide me from other mother's? If I could wish for one thing for the world, in my most Miss Teen USA voice and with my most beauty pageant-esque smile....I would wish for mother's to band together! To support each other in motherhood. To help each other out with the struggles of raising kids, with working through the different phases. To help each other get through the tough seasons in life when you don't think your children will every sit still and behave! That's what I wish!

If you every have any questions or what to learn more about struggling with breastfeeding and/or cloth diapering come over to Cammo Style Love or email me at cammostylelove@yahoo.com

What I Wish I Had Known...

I have another great guest post for you today!  Jamie is going to share some advice with you that she wishes someone had shared with her when she was pregnant.

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Hello! My name is Jamie, and I am an Army Wife and SAHM to my sweet baby girl, Adelei!
I blog over at This is Me; Consequently, but I’m guest posting here today to tell you some things that I only wish someone would have told me when I was expecting!

First of all, the basics….
 
Start buying the basics early on [when you have coupons or find sales!!]. These include diapers, wipes, baby shampoo, soap, lotion, & diaper rash cream. I suggest using diapers.com or amazon.com/mom to buy diapers & wipes in bulk. They are always having sales or e-coupons, & it is the easiest/cheapest way to go in the long run. I started out by buying 1 case of diapers & 1 case of wipes every pay period. I bought 2 cases of each size up to size 4.

Speaking of coupons…
There are a ton of websites that Mom’s should register on. Here are a few of my favorites. You will get coupons galore!
beechnut.com
gerber.com
similac.com*
huggies.com
pampers.com
Thebump.com
 
*Even if you plan on breastfeeding, you should still sign up for this JUST in case you have to supplement. You’ll already have your coupons & vouchers for emergency use.

Wow, babies are expensive & sensitive…
 
A lot of people will tell you to use Dreft to wash the baby’s clothes in, but there are a lot of different hypoallergenic laundry detergents that you can use. Dreft is the most expensive at around $10. Purex has one [in a white bottle] that costs $2.50 at the commissary for the 32 load bottle. This lasts forever! Also borax [20 minute mule] is sold at Walmart for somewhere around $4 a box & you definitely need to get this. If you have some clothes/blankets/burp cloths that gets spit up or formula on it, you can soak them in the sink just put enough water to completely cover the clothes add a handful of borax & let it sit for 20 or 30 minutes & the stains will come out. This even works if the stains have been there for a few days.

Ooh, the good life…
 
There were several things I thought I HAD to have for the baby just because the store sold it. For example, wipe warmer, bottle warmer, baby swaddling wraps, microwave bottle sterilizer, and spinning drying rack for bottles. Don’t fall for it. These are what I call ‘luxury’ baby items. Learn from my mistakes & save your money!
That about wraps it up! If you have any questions regarding things mentioned in this post, please feel free to email me at jaksart at rocketmail dot com

Do you have any new mom advice?

Munchkin’s Birth Story

*The following posts does describe labor and uses words such as pee, mucus plug, etc.  If these make you queasy, you might want to skip this post.  There are not many pictures as most of them are not fit for the internet.  If you want the short version, skip to the end!

After the failed induction, I kept having irregular contractions at home.  In the early morning hours of Friday, July 13, I went into active labor (I should mention that I never went to bed.)  Oh the pain.  I tried to get The Man up but couldn’t.  I started crying around 2 am and my mom heard me so she got up.  She labored with me and helped me manage the pain.  Around 5:30 I told The Man in no uncertain terms that he WAS getting up as I was in labor and needed him.  This time he listened.  In hindsight, it was good that he slept!

We’d been timing the contractions and while they were regular they weren’t as close as they could be.  We were unsure if we should call the hospital so we called my Doula, Ashley instead.  She got to our house about 45 minutes later and she helped with suggestions of ways to manage the pain.  I didn’t use as many of the techniques as that I thought I would.  At this point my favorite place to be was straddling the toilet and being able to rest my head on the tank.  Not sure why it was so comfy but it was!  Actually, I do know why…this way allowed people access to my lower back and they were able to massage it during a contraction.  Back labor at it’s finest people!

At one point we called the hospital but they said my contractions weren’t close enough consistently enough and that I should call back in two hours.  So we did and I was regular enough that I could head in.  I was really nervous because I didn’t want to be sent home!  We arrived at the hospital around 10, where we were warmly welcomed by the staff who was happy that this baby was finally on it’s way.  I was checked in triage and if I could have done a happy dance I would have, because I was 6-7 centimeters and there was talk of having a Friday the 13th baby.  No one thought it would take more than a few hours for munchkin to arrive!

We got to our room and immediately got in the tub.  The Man got in with me and it helped so much.  The water was so nice…I can’t stress how amazing the water was, especially with lavender added to it.  We were in there for over an hour before we got out.  Then the contractions started, stronger and more intense.  It took us a bit but then we realized I had hit transition.  Somewhere on one of my many trips to the potty I lost my mucus plug and then my water broke.  We all heard it.  Thankfully it went right in the toilet and we were able to see that it was clear. 

I continued to gush fluid.  I also had to pee ALL. THE. TIME.  Contractions didn’t hurt as bad with an empty bladder.  Needless to say I didn’t always make it to the bathroom.  I was leaking fluid, all sorts of fluid, everywhere and everyone seemed ok with that.  In addition to having to pee every 30 seconds, I would swing from breaking out into a sweat to shivering because I was so cold.  I had a robe on and when I would say hot Mom, The Man or Ashley would remove it.  When I would say cold, they would put it back on for me.  I remember being focused, focused on the pain.  I wasn’t screaming or crying, just silent as I focused on the pain of the current contraction.  I also threw up a couple of times, mostly acid that was hanging around in my tummy.  I was drinking water after every contraction and I don’t think that helped my bladder at all.

I eventually asked them to remove the clock because it became obvious that I wasn’t progressing very fast.  About two hours into my 7 hour transition, I felt the need to bear down and push. The problem?  I wasn’t fully dilated.  I had only dilated about another centimeter in the hours I had been there.  It finally got so bad that I was singing vowels during the contraction to keep from pushing.  I did this for 5 hours.  The whole floor heard me.  I think munchkin already knows her vowels.  I can’t sing, which probably made it worse for everyone else, but I had to take a deep breath and sing the vowels out high.  It went AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII, OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.  Over and over again.  For 5 hours.   And at some point they decided that my contractions were not consistent enough so they gave me Pitocin.  We started slow and moved it up.  It helped increase the intensity but they were painful.  Singing those vowels helped even if I had a sore throat for a few days!

Finally around midnight I was checked again and I was about 9 centimeters with a thicker lip around the back.  I had tried EVERYTHING. I had changed and tried lots of different positions.  I just needed to push and I couldn’t.  I was exhausted as I had been in active labor for 24 hours at this point and hadn’t had a nap at all.  I had the head bobs where you fall asleep for 15 seconds but that was it.  Our nurse Shelly very cautiously asked if we would consider an epidural to give me a break.  This was the first time it had been mentioned as I had asked in my birth plan to not have it offered to me.  I considered it and briefly talked about it with my support team.  In under two minutes I decided yes, I would get one, if only so I could take a nap!  She was surprised that I has said yes so quickly but it was already in my mind that it would be helpful.

Once I said yes, I had that epi within 20-30 minutes.  It was heavenly.  Oh my, why did I wait?  It was heaven.  I was afraid of moving during the placement of it and went from singing the vowels to singing the alphabet while squeezing The Man’s hands.  I started to get a headache but it went away for the most part.  I was a totally different person with the epi.  I turned into a chatty Cathy and while I tried to take a nap I didn’t.  The Docs were kind enough to give me an hour so I could labor down and rest.  So around 1:30 we started pushing.

I had the most perfect epidural EVER.  I could feel nothing, only pressure and I still had control over my legs.  Well, for the most part.  I was able to change positions with a little help.  I pushed on my back, on both sides, on my hands and knees…you name it, I tried it.  Sadly, Munchkin wouldn’t budge.  After checking me again, the doc decided that she was posterior.  She was getting caught on my pelvic bone.  After 3 hours of pushing she had moved 1 centimeter.  I was pushing as hard as I could with the help of everyone around me.  They were helping into position and counting for me.  But she was still to high for the help of a vacuum or forceps.  I was exhausted due to no sleep for so long and my neck was killing me.  I had been pushing to the max time they like, three hours and my water had broken over 12 hours ago.  The possibility of infection was going up with every cervical check and minute that passed by, The doctor asked us to consider an abdominal delivery.

I’m not going to lie, I knew where this was headed.  They had brought it up before and I had let them know that a c section was the last possible option for me.  I knew, going into this that this was going to happen.  I just had that feeling.  Every time I dreamed of Munchkin's birth it happen via c section. After a short talk with The Man first and then with my mom and Ashley, I decided that a c-section was necessary.  I had tried EVERTHING possible to avoid one.  The doctors reiterated that I had done everything possible and that they were impressed with everything I had done.  The Man, mom and Ashley kept telling me the same thing.  I have the satisfaction of knowing I tried everything.  I regret none of it.  Every once in a while I second guess myself but I do know that this was the best possible birth for us.

They got me prepped and wheeled into the OR.  My epi had worn off so the timing was perfect. It as the same anesthesiologist, Dr P,  and he was hysterical.  I was in pain, especially from the catheter but he had me laughing even as I kept telling him I was in pain.  He got me numb and brought The Man in as they were starting.  He wasn’t in there very long before Dr. P told him to stand up.  When he did he watched as Munchkin was born, nose up looking at the world, at exactly 5:45 am.  She was taken over to the table and was cleaned off, weighed and all that jazz.  Before to long she was handed off to The Man who brought her over to me so I could look at her.  She was perfect.  She wasn’t crying, in fact, she barely cried at all.  She had great color.  The Man stayed with me holding the little girl for another 20 minutes or so, then he headed back to our room so he could do skin to skin contact with the little miss.  My mom headed in to keep me company.  It was completely surreal.  They finished up quickly and there was so more talking and laughing with the doctors.  Then they brought me back to my room so I could hold munchkin.  I was already in love and just holding her cemented it.  She was hungry and latched right away.  It was a good, strong latch and she nursed and then fell asleep.  I couldn’t believe that our little girl was here!

New Mommy Advice

Hello dear readers! I have another wonderful guest post for you today.  Madeline is going to share with us some new mommy advice.  Much of what she says piggybacks off of Whitney's post.  I'm loving the wisdom these women are sharing and I hope you are too!

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Hi friends!  My name is Madeline and I blog over at Food, Fitness, and Family.  I love to write about yummy eats, sweaty workouts, and life as a family of three.  I am so excited for Poekitten and would like to officially welcome her to the “mom club”.  As someone once said, to be a mom is to have your heart outside your body and is entirely true.  What is even truer is just how fast time goes.  I would like to say I’m a new mom too but I am not sure if at 9-months in I still qualify but I would like to think I do ;)

As I said, my daughter Emmalyne is 9-months now and I am not exactly sure where time went.  The first couple of weeks when you are running on perpetual sleep deprivation and are just trying to survive make you think that time is at a stand still, however that is not the case.  You blink and your sweet, defenseless newborn baby is on the brink of toddlerhood and you wonder what happened.  So, I would like to impart on you, some words of wisdom that I wish I had known 9-months ago.


1. Smell your baby as often as you can. That newborn smell only lasts for a short
period of time.


2.  Embrace the middle of the night feedings.  It’s easy as a new mom to resent having to wake up in middle of the night and longing for a good nights rest.  Embrace those moments of complete quiet and relish in it.

3.  Let your baby nap on your chest.  Yes, a routine is important and getting them into their crib imperative for good habits, but those chest naps are also fleeting.  Emmie wants nothing to do with them now and I miss them like crazy.

Napping on Daddy –  2 weeks old

4.  The dishes can wait.  While I am not condoning living in squalor I do think that taking some pressure off the first couple of weeks is important.  One you need your rest and two refer to the above.  Time is precious.  Better yet?  If you can afford it get a cleaning service for the first month.

5.  Take photos and videos of everything.  I got the photo part down but not going to lie I slacked on the videos.  And I completely regret it already.  No matter how small something is remember it is a first.  There are only so many firsts in life and many of them are in this first year.

Emmalyne’s 1^st Christmas – 3 months old

6.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help.  Whether that means seeking out guidance in breastfeeding from a lactation consultant or asking someone to watch your baby so you can shower don’t be afraid to reach out.  Your family and friends WANT to be there for you.  Let them be.

7.  Remember your spouse.  As moms we like to be in charge.  Remember that your spouse needs bonding time too.  Cut out a special part of the day just for your spouse.  For us, it’s bedtime.  Emmie gets one bottle a day from her daddy and he puts her to sleep.  It gives me a break and him some quiet time with our daughter.

8.  Get out of the house.  Seriously.  Too many new moms find themselves rarely leaving home.  I can’t tell you the good that some sunshine and fresh air does for your mood.  I make a point of getting out of the house every day and have since Emmie was born.  Whether that is to go to the gym, run some errands, or just go on a walk I make sure we have something small to do.  She loves it and mommy needs it.

Picking pumpkins …  3 weeks old

9. Be confident.  Your instincts are probably right.  You are going to get advice (yes, this is ironic since my post IS advice) from every direction.  Choose what works best for YOUR baby.  Be confident in your choices.  You don’t need to defend yourself to anyone.  You will know your baby best.

10.  Know it keeps getting better and better.  I find myself saying all the time THIS is the best age.  Motherhood gets more and more amazing every single day.

Emmalyne and Mommy – 8 months old

Thanks again Poekitten for letting me be here today.  I wish you lots of love, luck, and happiness as you begin this new adventure in life.  I can’t wait to see what lies in store for you and your sweet family.

Baby Girl

 

The Man and I are

excited to share that

our daughter,

Munchkin

arrived on

July 14, 2012

weighing

7 pounds and 15 ounces

and measuring

21 1/4 inches long.

She made us wait but

it was well worth it!

Welcome to Motherhood

I have some wise words for you today.  Whitney is sharing some of her insights with you.  I know I will be coming back to this post for encouragement!

***

Hi! I'm Whitney from Navy Beans. My story? Well, in a nutshell, I'm a Christ-follower, Navy-wife, Mama to 4 little beans. I have 3 girls (6, 4, 3) and 1 son (18 months).
Hopefully my thoughts on new-mama-hood are helpful.... :)

When I was a new Mama....

....I wish I had taken every. single. person. up on their offers for help.  And used that time to either snuggle my String Bean, or sleep.

....I wish I had slept more.

....I wish I had not resented the lack of sleep, lack of space, complete flip-up of my life. I wish that I had realized this phase of utter-exhaustedness was just a phase. And that it would be gone entirely too fast.

....I wish I had sought out help and advice and knowledge about breastfeeding, instead of thinking I would just be able to figure it out on my own.

...I wish I had listened when my Mom told me that I wasn't going to spoil my newborn girl by holding her all the time.  How I regret those moments where I put her down because I thought I should - not because I had no choice.

Now for some un-solicited advice to all you New Mama's out there (I like to think I have the stretch marks to make me credible!)......

I wish I had known the exhausted-beyond-belief-phase would be so brief.

When you are in it, those first 6 weeks are absolute torture.

You don't really sleep. Your body aches. You are mentally and emotionally drained by trying to learn a new human being that only cries. You wonder if you are doing anything right.

Are they eating enough?

Are they eating too much?

Is sleep bad?

What does that cry mean?

and on and on....

You can be plagued with doubt. With fear.

Realize exhaustion is not the end of the world. You will sleep again one day! It just won't happen for about 6 weeks. Not that you will sleep THROUGH THE NIGHT in 6 weeks....but you will either adjust to constantly waking up, or finally get one long stretch of sleep. (Which in newborn world, is about 4 hours.)

I promise you - in just a few short months, you will feel like a pro. Unfortunately, a pro in motherhood does not mean you are an expert. It does not mean you are perfect. It means you love someone more than you thought humanly possible. It means daily living with the needs of someone else before your own. It means constantly going before the Lord and asking Him for wisdom and grace.

Be specific.
This is a pet peeve of mine. When it comes time for people to bring you food - don't say "Oh! We like anything." If, in reality, you hate Mexican food. Because, odds are, you are going to get a whole lotta Mexican dishes. No one wants to put the time and effort into making a meal someone will loathe and/or not eat.  If you are particular, tell people exactly what you like!

You are not being a Diva.

You are being considerate.

Stock up of one-handed snacks
You will be holding a baby, rocking a baby, feeding a baby, diapering a baby, and kissing a baby, all day long. At some point, you need to eat! I buy a pack of large tortilla wraps and load whatever I was planning on eating into that. I have eaten stir-fry, casserole, chicken Cesar salad, (and everything in between!) in a wrap.  I throw a receiving blanket over the baby to catch any falling food, and eat. That way I don't waste time eating, when I could be sleeping! (Straws are actually great too. Less accidental mess on baby.)



Hug and snuggle your baby constantly. Wear them if you can!
I don't know what I would have done without my sling for those first 4 months. I folded laundry, put away groceries, did dishes, shopped, read stories, cleaned the house, went on walks, and even nursed with my sling! It is a life saver. If you have a munchkin who screams like their arms are being ripped off when you put them down - get a sling. Seriously. It often takes 2-3 days for them (and you) to be fully comfortable in it...but it is worth the effort! (I also use the Baby Bjorn and Snugli as they get older)

Sleep.
Seriously, don't sacrifice a chance to sleep. Use paper plates to save time on dishes. Let the house be a bit dirty. Don't go all over the place with the new baby. You need, really NEED, to sleep. So does baby.  You are not being selfish or a wimp. You are being an excellent Mommy.

You are taking care of yourself and your new baby - so take a nap.

Leave the guilt at the hospital.

Hydrate.
Drink more water than you thought humanly possible.  Twice. (Especially if you are breastfeeding)




Give your husband your vote of confidence.
He is just as nervous about becoming Daddy as you are about becoming Mommy!
He needs to know you are in his corner. He may will do things differently than you, and that is okay. He may not know all the things you have learned about newborns. Allow your husband the space to learn how to hold your little girl. Enjoy how he communicates with her - he doesn't have to do it like you! They will bond - but most of that depends on you. You need to share what you know in a way that builds him up.  My Love always went with the nurse to observe the first bath - and then when we got home, he taught me how to do it.

Ask for help/take people up on their offers.
One of the most valuable gifts I ever received? Folded laundry.  My Love knew I was overwhelmed when our 3rd was born...

(I mean, I did have a 3 1/2 year old, 19 month old, and a newborn, so that was probably obvious to everyone.)

...so he asked a friend to come help me out. While #3 and I were napping, my friend came in and folded my laundry, washed my dishes, and left dinner cooking on the stove.

I cried like a baby when I woke up.

With my first, I thought I could do it all. So I didn't reach out for help - I didn't ask for it, I didn't accept it - and I greatly regret that decision. It is such an amazing gift to be helped. Assume the person offering actually does WANT to help you! Let them go to the store - run an errand - bring you dinner. There is no shame in needing help.


Ask for help.
Yes, I know I already said this. However, now I'm talking about the really uncomfortable stuff. If you need help with breastfeeding - ASK FOR HELP.  Do not think you are a failure or incompetent. It is hard work. Breastfeeding is a very natural thing - but it does NOT come naturally. It takes a lot of support to be able to succeed. (And if it doesn't work and you end up using formula - you are not a failure then either.)


Ask for help if you are unsure of something with your munchkin - if they aren't sleeping well or spitting up or crying constantly. You are NOT a failure for needing help. EVERY mama needs help with their children! It does get easier as you get to know each other - but seasoned mama's have a larger arsenal of tools than a brand new one. AND they are actually sleeping at night. Seek their advice - you don't have to use it, but it will be so helpful to have.

Cut your body some slack.
You may be one of those rare people who slips out a baby and then *BAM* looks just like your pre-pregnant self. If you are - I may just have to start throwing things at you. If you are like the rest of womankind, be prepared for some serious jiggle. Your body just went through the war...don't expect it to look like your old self right away.  AND THAT IS OKAY. Personally, I avoid full length mirrors for at least 4 weeks after delivery....unless the lighting is really favorable and my milk has completely come in. That is actually not an unappealing silhouette. (This is all coming from a woman who gained a good bit of weight...55/55/35/25....I know about jiggle.) Try to remember that the first 3 months after having a baby - your hard work is not working out. It is learning that person; developing into "Mom;" learning how to breastfeed; understanding how your baby communicates; figuring out how your family works; even how to shower every 24 hours!

You will be able to work out again -

but allow yourself the space to prioritize other things for a little bit.

Above all - cut yourself some slack.
You will not be perfect. You will make mistakes. You will have regrets.  But eventually, all of these anxious moments will melt and you will realize motherhood becomes you.  That doesn't mean you will suddenly be secure in all your decisions - it just means that although you will not always make the right decision, you are always seeking to make the best one possible.

Welcome to motherhood...

the most exhausting, rewarding, challenging, amazing, and refining, role there is.

~Whitney
Copyright 2012

A Paper Pregnancy

Hello friends!  I have another great guest post for you today, this time from a slightly different point of view.  Armymomma is sharing how she became a mommy with us today in her first guest post.  Thank you for taking over my blog for the day!

***

Hi!  I am Armymomma.  I blog (rather infrequently) over at http://armymomma.wordpress.com/
I am married to a soldier.  I stay at home with my 2 kiddos, affectionately referred to as Thing1 and Thing2.  I also do in home child care.

Although I have 2 kids, I have never been physically pregnant.  Both of my boys were adopted.  So, I got to be paper pregnant.  I am going to share my very first paper pregnancy with you!

We started the home study in January 2006.  We worked our tails off and had everything completed and were officially waiting in March.  We were young, educated, childless, and attractive (or so the agency said) so we were told to be ready because we were going to get called right away.  From the day I found out we were home study approved and waiting, I never went anywhere without a phone.  Every time the phone rang, I thought, “This is it!”

March ended.  April came.  And went.  May came and went.  June began.  I was getting VERY frustrated by this point.  So, I began looking into other options.  I found another organization to work with.  They networked with agencies and dealt with situations where there were not enough families to present to the expectant mom.  (Some examples: some agencies have trouble placing kids of certain races. Kids with medical issues are harder to find families for.)

We signed on with the additional organization at the end of June.  On July 27, we got a call from that organization.  There was a little boy with a possible medical issue and the agency had no families available.  Were we interested?  I did some quick research and ran into my husband’s work to show him.  He listened and asked one question, “Are we bringing him into our home to watch him die?”  I assured him that the condition they suspected came with a normal life expectancy.  He said, “Then, let’s do it!”  (One of the many reasons I love this man!)

After a couple days of frantic phone calls, paper work, and travel, our son was placed in our arms on July 30, 2006.  He was 10 days old.  We walked in empty handed and walked out with a child.  As we drove away, we looked at each other.  I said something along the lines of, “This seems too easy.  Is this really our baby?”

It was quickly determined that our son did not have the condition that was suspected at birth.  Shortly after his second birthday, we found out he had a more serious and scary condition.  I am so thankful God hid that condition at birth because we probably would have said no to that call.  If you want to read more about it, feel free to check out my blog.

Failed Induction

As most of you know I was scheduled for an induction due to my GD on Monday July 9th.  Things did not go as planned!  We’re totally ok with how things turned out and are looking forward to the completion of Munchkin’s birth story.  I’m giving you the short version.  I had the long version written out and lost it and I don’t feel like writing it out again. 

When I went in to L&D Monday night because we had to start with ripening (softening) the cervix.  This way while the medicine was working I could sleep and get some rest.  Unfortunately the first medicine, cervidil, did not work so we moved on to the next one, cytotec.  I had wanted to avoid the use of this medication since it is no FDA approved for use as a ripening agent and doing some research, but after talking to the doctors I agreed to try it.  I started on a lower dose on 50mg.  It produced some contractions but a little dilation but did not change anything else. 

4-6 hours after taking it I was still have contractions to close together to get another dose so we just waited it out.  I was dilated about 1-2 centimeters and continued to be about 75% effaced.  Munchkin had not dropped at all so she was still –2 station. 

Before I got another dose, this time of 100 mg, I snuck a sandwich.  The doctors didn’t want me to eat in case there was an emergency and I needed general anesthesia so I was on a liquid diet for most of Tuesday.  I was not a happy camper, especially since I only got the ok for the liquid diet after much persistence on the part of my nurse.  My night nurse told me I should eat and so there was no arguing from us and The Man went and got me a 6 inch subway sub.  Nothing has tasted so good!

So around 8 I got the next dose and it produced contractions but  there was no more progress.  I was still having somewhat regular contractions and they were making it hard to sleep.  We decided to discuss our options.  I will say that no one was rushing us.  As they told us, we were working against my body and trying to make it do something it wasn’t ready to do.  They were willing to go slow.  The night docs didn’t think that more cytotec was going to do anything for more for me so they were will to either do a Foley bulb or to try Pitocin.  We decided to try the Foley bulb to get a little more dilation before starting the Pitocin.   

The Foley bulb got placed with minimal pain and then we waited.  We tried to sleep but that didn’t work.  The Man and I were both exhausted.  We had sent Nana home the night before so at least one of us was well rested!  Eventually they removed the Foley Bulb and to our surprise IT DID NOTHING.  Still no progress past the 2 centimeters of dilation.  So we talked with the the doc (who we really, really liked) and agreed that we would move on to the Pitocin.

The snag came when turnover happened.  One of the residents came in with our new nurse and they did a cervical check.  This guy has HUGE hands and every time he’s checked me he could never find my cervix cause it was still posterior so he would have the nurse check after him.  That was fine but seriously, I hate having so many hands up there!  Since there was no progress he kinda said in passing to the nurse that we would do another round of 100 mg of cytotec.  WHAT?!?!  That wasn’t the plan!  That wasn’t what we had decided on with the night doc!  I wasn’t super comfy taking the cytotec in the first place and didn’t want to take another dose that large.  He didn’t talk to us about it but we knew we would get a chance to soon.

Then the nurse needed to take my blood pressure and I asked for it to be done manually.  My blood pressure has been fine but on the low side and often the machine has a hard time picking it up so it squeezes and squeezes and leaves a bruise.  She decided the give me a little lecture on how she could do it now but when it got busy later and had to take my blood pressure every 2-5 minutes she would have to use the machine.  Her tone was that of talking down to me like I was a kid.  Granted, I was exhausted but I was in disbelief.  I don’t remember what I said but during her speech The Man reached for his phone texted our doula and requested her presence.  We also alerted Nana that she should come back sooner rather than later so she was on her way as well.  Good thing we only live about 10 minutes away!

While we were waiting for the rest of my support team, The Man went to request a new nurse.  He asked for the nurse in charge and got directed to our nurse! He very calmly and nicely said we would like a different nurse.  She said that she would let the head nurse know and they would move thing around.  She did come in a little while later an apologize but we did get a new nurse.  (For the record, I’m sure the first nurse was very good at her job but it our personalities just didn’t mesh, especially with us having so little sleep.)

That was fine then the team of doctors walked in, all 6 of them.  One of them was our night doc and the rest were the night team.  We talked about the progress (or lack of) that I had made.  The night doc talked and told me he would be back that night, which made us very happy.  Then doc who would be in charge took over and said that cytotec was how we should go.  She talked about several things that I don’t remember at this point but she did agree that I since I didn’t get any sleep that I should rest.  She was going to give me three hours to rest and then we would continue.  While she was talking we got the impression that not everyone agreed with her.  She also told us that she was on for 24 hours so we would have some continuity.

They gave me a Benadryl and while I slept my mom stayed with me while The Man went and talked with our doula Ashley.  They talked and did a little research.  When they came back I was awake and the 4 of us talked and agreed on what we wanted.  The head doc came back with our nurse.  As she was talking another doc, Doc Z came in.  In talking one on one with the doc I became more comfortable with her.  She was recommending continuing on the cytotec but on a dose of 25 or 50 mg, something I was much more comfortable with.  We were testing the waters to see if they might let us go home but she nipped that idea in the bud and said that since it wasn’t an elective induction that wasn’t an option.  We also wanted a few more hours to try some natural methods like pressure points and nipple stimulation.  She shot that down too, in a nice way, since that was something she didn’t have experience/knowledge with.  She also told us that she would be doing clinicals that afternoon and would check on us when we got back.  We asked for some time to talk and decide and the Doc Z said he had something he would like to talk to us about.

So we talked and decided to do the 25 mg cytotec.  I got my lunch of baked chicken, steamed carrots and diet noodles and dug in. I was afraid they were going to take away my food again!  Doc Z came in to talk to us.  He started off by asking if we were Christians.  When we said yes, he offered to pray with us.  We were surprised and said of course!  Then he went on and told us about a little of what he studied in school.  I forget what it was called but there was this one thing that was stressed not to do on pregnant women because it could cause them to go into labor.  While he had done it for a few other women, it had only worked once but he offered to do it to me (I think it was called a CV4 but I’m not sure.)  It was basically a head massage.  We said yes to that too!  He would do it before I was given the cytotec and that he would be back when I was done eating.

About 20 minutes later, some more doctors came in.  This time in charge was Dr. T, the doc we had been seeing for infertility treatments.  He came in and said that since I was only taking 1/2 a glyburide pill I was very low risk.  I had been lumped in since I did have GD but all things considered my risk was small and since my body wasn’t ready there was no reason to push it.  He told us that if we wanted, we could go home!  If we chose that we would do a non stress test at the end of the week and that I could come back on my due date.  We jumped at this!  We can always go back in if I go into labor.  Dr. T and Dr. Z are going to be duty on Saturday and my midwife who’s been out of town will be on duty on Monday when I go in.  I’m excited that she’ll be there! 

We packed up the room super quickly (we had moved in and there was a ton to stuff!) and then had to wait for the discharge papers.  I was so excited to be going home, even if I didn’t have a baby in my arms!

So the induction failed and we are so, so thankful that Munchkin & I are fine.  It was so nice to sleep in my own bed next to The Man last night.  It was great to see the furbabies and just be able to relax at home.  I’m can’t tell you how thankful I am that we walked through this with both of us being fine.  Munchkin’s heartbeat remained strong the entire time and I’m doing great too.  This could have ended in a c-section and it didn’t.  We’re still here and still praying we’ll get our natural unmediated childbirth

I’m currently having irregular contractions.  It’s a warm, sunny day here in the PNW and I think I’m going to head outside and enjoy the warmth and a book.  We have nothing planned since we were expecting to be getting baby snuggles but this works too.

Thank you for your prayers and your concern.

We appreciate your continued prayers.

I keep you posted on when the little miss makes her appearance.

First Night Home

I have another great guest post for you today!  The lovely Steph from Watching Airplanes is going to share with you about her first night at home as a mom.  I’m sure many of you can relate!

***

Hello everyone!  My name is Steph and I blog at Watching Airplanes.  I'm 29 ish and a new mommy to our baby girl, Aubria.  She was born on April 30th.  My husband, Matt, was Active Duty Army, then Army Reserves, and is now in the National Guard.  He's pretty "special" but I wouldn't trade him or Aubria for the world.
First of all, thank you PoeKitten for allowing to post on your blog while you are away from it.  I wish you and your husband nothing but the best in your adventure of parenthood. 

******* 

 
Aubria (we call her Aubri, too) was born on a Monday morning at 7:47 a.m.  On Wednesday around noon, they said we could go home.  They didn't screen us to make sure we were fit parents.  They just gave us a few instructions on how to give her a bath and what her poop should look like and stuff like that.  Then they sent us on our way.

The first afternoon and evening went well.  She slept a lot.  I straightened up the house and my husband played in his garage for awhile.

Then came bedtime.  I had gotten a pretty pink bassinet at my baby shower.  It has toys, made womb sounds, and vibrates.  You know, the whole nine yards.  I thought, what baby girl wouldn't want to sleep in it.

Matt and I had decided that we were going to wake up with her together, feed her together, changer her together.  Well, that went out the window around midnight when she had already been awake three times.  Matt looked at me and said, "Babe, I can't. Can you take care of her and I will next time?"  I told him that was fine.
So, we alternated shifts.  Feed her. Changed her. Rocked her. Put her down.  Repeat.  At some point in the night, I woke up and found him asleep on the floor next to her bassinet, in our room, covered up with a baby afghan.  I was too tired to take a pictures but I should have.

Around 5:00 a.m., I texted my mom.  She had told us that if we needed anything to let her know and that she would come over the next morning.  I texted her and told her that we were up and to come over whenever she was ready.  She showed up around 6 and rang the doorbell a couple times before Matt heard it. (I never heard it.)  From what she told me later, Matt opened the front door in his boxers, hung his head, turned around and headed to the bedroom, and didn't say a word.  Mom took care of Aubri and let us sleep till 10:00 or so.

At some point the next day, we decided that maybe she hated her bassinet.  I had bought a rock -n- play to carry around from room to room and use in the camper.  So, we thought maybe we would try that the next night.  It cradles her more and I could rock her in it while laying in bed.  It was worth a shot.

The next night we put her in it she slept three hours at a time.  She's slept in it ever since.  She's actually sleeping in it as I type this.  I take it to the living room for her to nap in, she'll lay in it in the kitchen while we eat, and we've taken her camping and she's slept in it in the camper.  I would definitely recommend having one.  It was, by far, the best $50 investment we made in baby gear.

Congrats again to PoeKitten and family!  Hope your first night home goes smoothly!

Baby Shower Gift Ideas

To kick off the guest posting party I have a blogger from my home state of MA.  I got to meet her when I was home last time and she's great.  I hope you enjoy her post and get some inspiration for the next time you need to buy a baby gift.

***

Hello!  I'm Jodi and I blog at Jodi Bean's Blog.  If you are reading this it means Poekitten has had her daughter and is hopefully getting plenty of rest and quality time with family!  Congrats Poekitten!  

I'm happy to be a guest blogger today to share with you a few of my favorite baby gifts to give.  I don't have any children of my own but I've been to quite a few baby showers over the years.  These gifts are some of the best!  Take a look for yourself. 

Picky Sticky 
$12.95-$19.95

I started giving these as a gift a few years ago (before they were very popular) and I always got plenty of compliments on them.  Now they have become more mainstream and you can find them everywhere.  But I still love them!  I think they make a great gift.  I've especially found them to be a good thing to mail in a card after a baby is born - cute gift and no package needed!

I See Me 
$32.95

These personalized books are adorable.  I've been giving these as gifts for several years and I've always been pleased with the quality and customer service.  The books are really sweet and the stories spell out the child's name.  They have expanded their selection recently and now have birthday books, big brother/sister books, Christmas books, and more.  Of course this is a gift you can't give until you know the child's name but it is worth the wait!

Miracle Blanket 
$24.95

I first learned about these blankets while I was working as an adoption social worker.  I of course was around a lot of babies and also a saw a lot of baby gifts.  Parents repeatedly told me how amazing this blanket was.  I gave one to my brother and sister-in-law when Ella was born and she slept in it for months.  She slept well.  Since then I have given it to our friends who swear by it.  I've been told it is way better than "regular" swaddling blankets.  Give this to your friends and they will thank you!

Nap Nanny 
$129.99

I've been told that this is a magic sleeping spot and that your baby will sleep well when using this!  Ha!  Something to do w/ the angle the baby is at when sleeping in this is suppose to be good for acid reflux.  Whatever it is I've been told by many that it works. . . really well!  It is portable and can be used anywhere (on the floor).  A bit more expensive than the other gift suggestions but good if it is someone you want to spend more on!
 

Diaper Cake

We all know that every baby is going to need a lot of diapers.  It is not a glamorous gift to give but practical and appreciated by most parents.  So if you have to give diapers why not make them look cute!  I've made several diaper cakes over the years and they make a great decoration/centerpiece as well as a useful gift.  I pretty much taught myself how to make them but you can also google it and find plenty of how to guides.  I usually use size 1 or 2 diapers.  Price will vary depending on what brand of diapers you buy and how many you use. 

So there you have it.  A handful of my favorites.  I of course love to buy clothes for the littles too.  Shopping for newborns and babies is the best!  But we all know that baby is going to get plenty of clothes so try out one of these creative gifts next time you are invited to a baby shower!

Do you have a go to gift for a baby shower?

39 Weeks

I’ll be 39 weeks tomorrow.  That’s the magic number for me.  Since munchkin did not cooperate this weekend and come on her own we get evict her.

We’re mean parents, I know.

Before you start giving me a hard time about evicting her at 39 weeks, please realize that the induction is scheduled for medical reasons.  In women with gestational diabetes, the placenta starts to break down sooner, often around 39 weeks.  Going longer increases the likelihood of munchkin being stillborn.  We’re very much not ok with that and are willing to go with the knowledge of our midwife and the medical community has so we’re going with it.

I had really hoped to avoid the induction but since my daughter is cozy we’ll force her out.  I”d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous.  I am, mostly because of the complications that can arise.  I’d really  love to avoid a c-section so I’m praying that the induction will be successful.  I’m still praying that I’ll be able to have a pain med free birth. 

The current plan, which may change, has us calling Labor & Delivery Monday night.  If there is room for us and no emergencies, we’ll go in an hour later so they can start the induction process.  I’ll get a sleeping pill and hopefully get some rest.  The best case scenario is that I go into labor from this medication.  If not, I’ll get Pitocin on Tuesday morning and we’ll go from there.  Sooner or later we’ll have a munchkin!

I would very much appreciate your prayers.  I would appreciate prayers for The Man and I, that we would be able to make the necessary decisions and for the hospital staff, for wisdom and discernment.  I’m struggling a little with trust at the moment because this is not the birth I’d hoped for and wanted.  I know that God already knows what will happen and He is in control.  I’m doing my best to rest in Him but I’m struggling just a little bit.  Thank you!

5 Tips for Handling Pregnancy During Deployment

To start off my guest posts I have a great one for you from Adrienne.  She’ll be giving you some ideas on how to handle being pregnant while your husband is deployed.  Adrienne, thank you for taking over my blog for the day!

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A mother-to-be rarely wants to experience her pregnancy without her husband, but unfortunately for us as military wives, we often don't have a choice. Deployment is simply a fact of life for military families, and many a military wife has gone through pregnancy solo because of the miracle of military timing!
However, a pregnancy without your husband by your side doesn't have to be a negative experience. In fact, there are several ways that your pregnancy can still be a special time for both military wives and their deployed spouses:
Share the Excitement
While pregnancy is by no means a perfect experience 100 percent of the time, that doesn't mean that you need to continually complain to your deployed spouse about not having him nearby. Try to maintain the excitement about your pregnancy by frequently sharing ultrasounds and pictures of your growing belly.
Not only will you both remain more positive about the distance, but also the air of excitement will help ease your spouse's mind about you being without him.
Choose Baby Names Together
Just because your miles about doesn't mean you still can't pick out the baby's name together. During his downtime he can brainstorm names, and you can do the same during yours. When you have time to email, Skype, or talk on the phone, share your favorite names and pick one together.
Surprise! Surprise!
There is a good chance that your spouse was called into deployment before finding out the sex of the baby. To let him know whether he will be having a son or daughter, think of a fun or clever way to tell him. Send him a care package with items saying, “It's a Boy!” or send a baked good with either pink or blue at the center.
See this great video on making the perfect care package!
Design the Nursery
One of the most fun pre-birth activities is decorating the nursery. Pinterest has some great ideas for decorating and can help keep your mind of your spouse being gone.
Be sure to send pictures of items you find for the nursery, as well as several updates of the nursery as it progresses. Also be sure to take suggestions and ideas from your spouse so that you can essentially decorate the room together.
Stay Social
Pregnancy is a time full of emotions, as well as physical strain. Remain active and social. Maybe even take a day trip to the zoo!
Don't be afraid to reach out to close friends and family for additional support when necessary. You may even consider having a sibling live with you or choosing to live with your parents when you get closer to your due date.
Not only will this provide you with the additional needed support, but it will help deter feelings of resentment towards your deployed spouse.
Being apart during deployment is never the easiest event for an expecting couple, and it is probably not how you pictured having a child when you dreamed about it. Let go of your expectations of perfection, roll with it, and you will be delighted and surprised by how special your experience will be. You simply have to be a little more creative, either by using a few of these ideas or by employing a few of your own.
Adrienne May is a military spouse and mother of three. Adrienne is also the featured author for Military Spouse Central and Military Family Central, two blogs proudly sponsored by Veterans United Home Loans. Connect with Adrienne personally on Google+ or Twitter!

The Next Month

Munchkin could/should be arriving any day now.  As much as I love you guys, I know the last thing I’m going to want to do is worry about the blog.  About a month ago I put out a request for guest bloggers and I got a great response.  I have some awesome guest bloggers for you.  I hope you’ll  welcome them and leave lots of comments!  You might even find some more blogs to read. 

Never fear, I’ll be chiming in once in a while.  I’ll share once Munchkin is born (though the fastest way to find out is to either be a personal friend on FB or follow me on Twitter) and I’ll get her birth story up eventually.  I’m very much looking forward to meeting our little girl and spending time with my family.  I'm actually looking forward to a break from the internet!  I know you understand.  And I’ll respond to comments but it will probably take me awhile.

 Thank you so much for understanding!