Visiting the 9/11 Memorial

It was a cold December morning when we visited the 9/11 memorial.  We were in New York City for a day and a half and we were visiting because it was the one place on my must visit list for the short time we were in town.  I had been a college senior going to school just outside the city in a town on the Hudson River when Twin Towers fell, the planes crashed into the Pentagon and the plane crashed in PA.  After that day I was never same and I know as a nation we were never the same.  Since we now live on the west coast, I wasn’t sure when I would get the chance to visit the memorial again.  I’ve been wanting to visit so I jumped at the chance, even though the memorial is not complete.

For Dads

I don’t think many guys read my blog.  In fact, I’d be surprised if any other man than The Man and an elder from church (Hi T!) stop by on a regular basis.  But I have something I’d like to share with the guys, especially those of you who are dads to daughters.  Wives, if you agree with this, please share it with your husbands.  I belive the message is important.

I read this article that a friend posted on Facebook and it made me cry.  Here’s the article.  Take a minute and go read it.  I’ll wait….

It made me cry because my dad did the things that the author talks about.  After 32 years, with my dad gone for 4 months, I still believe and know the things he often told me.  I know he loved me.  I know he was proud of me.  I know that I’m still his little girl.  And I know that I’m beautiful.  How do I know these things?  My daddy told them to me.  He told them to me often. 

When I got to the hospital and met his doctors for the first time, they told me, “Your dad had talked about you! You lived in Asia for awhile.  How did you like that?  And you’re now living in WA, right?  How do you like the West Coast?”  Even as my daddy lay dying, he was still talking about how proud of me he was.  And they didn’t know these thing because he just told them, they had heard over and over again about me.  At doctor visits, at other hospital visits…he loved to talk about my mom and I.  At the wake, I had people come up to me that I had no idea who they were and they knew about things I had done.  They knew because my daddy talked about me.  He loved me and was proud of me.

What a gift this had been.  There were times growing up that I had heard it so often that I would just say “Yes, dad, I know.  I love you too!” and not think too much about it.  But now, after he’s gone I treasure those words.  I know that they are true, without a doubt.  I can hear him saying them to me in my head…and I’m thankful for that.  So thankful.

I married a man like my daddy. And while my dad could drive me crazy like no one else, He was a good man, a godly man. I married a good man, a godly. A man who loves me, takes care of me, who tells me when I’m wrong, who wants me to grow, who makes me laugh, who drives me crazy and a man who I’m thankful will by munchkin’s daddy. 

So dads, don’t underestimate your influence in your daughter’s life.  Tell your daughter that you love her.  Tell her that you’re proud of her.  Tell her that you think she’s beautiful.  Even when she rolls her eyes, tell her again.  It will sink it.  She hears it.  I promise.

 

*I know nothing about the church or the blog where this article is from.  I don’t know if agree with their beliefs or not.  I am not promoting their church, blog or beliefs and they don’t know I wrote this post.  This article touched me and I wanted to share.

Missing the Past

A friend who was in Viet Nam with me shared this video on Facebook and it made me homesick for Viet Nam.  I was also realizing that in June of this year, it will have been 10 years since I moved to China.  In August it will be 9 years since I moved to Viet Nam.



 As I watched this video I saw places that I spent time. The traffic is familiar and isn't it amazing that I'm still alive?  I remember less cars but still, it's crazy.  I would pray every time I got on the back of the motor bike!  And the scene where you see a bunch of people in plastic chairs on the sidewalk?  How I miss street food!  I try not to think about it too often otherwise I get a craving for it and it takes DAYS for it to go away.  Even though we have Vietnamese restaurants here, it's not the same.  But what I wouldn't do for a bowl of Pho Bo...

Even though I miss it and am so, so, so thankful for my time there, I am happy where I am right now.  I don't wish to go back.  That was then and it helped shape me into who I am today.  I miss my friends but am thankful for things like Facebook that help us keep in touch.  I just wish it wasn't so far away and cost so much...I'd love to go for a long weekend!  I can't wait to take The Man there some day and enjoy it with him!

Is there a place from your past that you'd love to take your SO to?

What were you doing ten years ago?

2011

2011 was quite a year.  There was good and bad, both of which God used to continue to shape and mold me as a person and also my marriage.

The year started off well with The Man continuing to work on his sobriety.  It was a time of change.  His schedule was a bit crazy and continued that way into February and March.  I didn't love how busy he was with work, helping coach basketball and rehearsals for a show he was in.  There were days that I barely saw him! But we got through it and and April was much better, especially since the show, Sweeney Todd was running. It was a great show and I'm so glad he did it!

May brought a TDY and The Man was back out to sea.  I missed him while he was gone but the time apart was good for us.  He enjoyed being back out and I enjoyed having some time alone too.  And of course, homecoming is always the best part!  We also enjoyed June and July cause we worked on our very first garden.  We were so excited to grow and eat our own veggies!  We are eagerly awaiting spring so we can garden again.  We've already been talking about what we're growing this year...

One of the many house projects

August was good to us.  Looking back, I'm glad it was!  We managed to fit in a trip to Disney Land.  We wanted to go at least once before kids so we could enjoy it just the two of us.  Once we got home we bought a new truck, which we are still enjoying and getting a lot of use out of.  In order for The Man to do the projects he wants to around the house, it's much easier having the truck to haul supplies and debris & trash after!

September started off great with a camping trip.  We hadn't been camping in about two years and were really wanting to go, so we carved out Labor Day weekend for a trip to a nearby campground.  I thought I had posted about it but I guess not.  I think it got overshadowed by what happened next.  I headed to the East Coast cause my dad was in the hospital.  I was going so I could help my mom out and be there when he got home so he wouldn't have to go to a rehab facility.  It didn't turn out that way.  Instead of returning to his earthly home, daddy went to his forever home.  The pain for us is horrible but knowing where daddy is helps.  It also helps knowing that I'll see him again.  I'm looking forward to that!  From daddy's homecoming did come some good.  One good thing was the opportunity to see friends and family and make more memories with them.  People and relationships are so important and I don't like to waste any chance I have to spend time with the people who are important to me!  The memories we made make me smile.

Joey hugging Dad

Our family expanded again with the addition of dad's dog Joey.  We love him but he's been a little trying at time.  We're working on discipline and listening and he's getting better.  He's so much more fun and enjoyable when he behaves!

At the end of October mom came for a visit and while she was here we got some great news!  We found that we were pregnant!  Even though I didn't share with you until December we knew at the very beginning of November.  Morning sickness, fatigue and other fun symptoms have hit and I'm very much looking forward to the second trimester.  Even with not feeling the best, we had a wonderful Christmas.  We were blessed with great gifts and enjoyed spending time with most of The Man's family.

And how could I forget?  We managed to get down to Eugene for a Ducks game.  Not just any game but the Civil War!  I love going to games at Autzen.

And even more importantly, The Man got one year of sobriety in November.  This is huge and I know it wasn't easy.  I am so proud of him for this accomplishment!

2012 is going to bring even more change to our family.  We know what some of them are but know that there are many surprises in store for us.  So we go into the New Year thankful for each other and our families and friends and we know that nothing that happens will surprise God.  He'll be there with us every step of the way.

One Month

It's been a month since daddy went home.

It still seems surreal in many ways.

I have good days 

and

I have bad days.

I miss talking to him on the phone.

He would always tell me about 

the weather

and

what he was cooking

or 

had cooked

and

what their upcoming plans were.

He would often

talk to me about Joey too.

He would mention what 

a pain Joey could be

because he always wanted

to be in dad's lap.

Guess what?

Joey CAN be a pain

because he always wants

to be in your lap.

ALL. THE. TIME.

Joey's doing well though.

His latest trick?

Destroying Molly's tennis balls.

I found this when I woke up one morning

It's ok cause Molly is eating his bones.

Sibling rivalry, right?

Mom's coming out this week for a visit.

This trip has been in the works for weeks.

I'm looking forward to it 

and am so glad that it has been planned.

We don't have too much planned.

Just a conference in Seattle

and hanging out here.

She's finally going to get 

to see our house!

She's excited for that.

I am too, 

to tell you the truth.

I know today is going to be hard for her too.

Every day that goes by

makes it that much more real

that he's not here.

That he's not coming back.

And we know it.

It just sinks

deeper

and 

deeper

in. 

We miss you dad.

But we're ok.

Just ok...

for now.

Childhood Games

As a kid, I lived on a busy main street in our town.  One of the houses next door had 3 kids. There were 2 girls, 3 & 4 years older than I and one boy about 3 years younger.  I called them "the kids."  I would go over and ask if the kids could come out and play.  If I didn't go over there they would come ask I could go go play.  It was great.  We did all the normal things kids did...played school, rode bikes and just generally used our imaginations.  One of our favorite things to do was to crush rocks.  Silly I know.

Source

We would spent hours looking for pretty rocks.  Little ones.  Then we would find a big rock and crush the little rocks to make rock powder.  I'm not sure what were would have done with the powder but I think we were going to fill jars with it and make pretty designs.  We never got enough powder because some adult would hear us and come tell us to stop.  They were afraid that we would get pieces of flying rock in our eyes or crush our fingers (silly parents!)  We would stop but inevitably we would try again.  And again.  We never got in trouble for it, we were just told to stop.

I know this is a random childhood story but I was reminded of it today while I was babysitting E.  It was a gorgeous day and we spent some time in the backyard.  She's about 14 months and she's fascinated by the grass and leaves and dandelions and rocks.  She kept picking them up and trying to eat them.  Not surprising but it triggered the memory.

It was a memory that made me smile.  I had a wonderful childhood, one that I'm thankful for.

Do you have a childhood memory that makes you smile?

A Month of Thanks; Black Friday Tradition

I'm thankful for traditions.  When you have traditions that you love, you look forward to them happening!  I hate getting early but I LOVE my family's Black Friday tradition.  For about 20 years, My mom, Aunt, cousin & I have been getting up crazy early to go shopping.

The tradition was born when there were lots of people to but for and saving money way key.  My cousins & I would create lists for family about what we wanted for Christmas.  Then on Thanksgiving night we would pore over the ads.  (Back then I was pointing out what I wanted, not deciding what I wanted to buy!)  We would often choose where to go first based on what time they opened, what items we wanted to buy there and what they were giving away.  Back in the day the stores used to give away things.  I remember getting CD's, stickers, chocolate and mini snowglobes. Actually, JC Penny's still hands out mini snowglobes...I have a few.  We would split up (mom & Auntie, my cousin & I) and shop, often hiding our baskets when we came close to each other.  We would hit the stores we wanted and then get some breakfast.  Breakfast is a great way to end the morning!  The afternoon almost always included a nap...still does!  I get pretty cranky when I'm tired.

While I was in Asia a friend of my cousin would take my place so she would have some one to shop with.  She went with us once I got back.  She's stopped coming now, so it's just the 4 of us again.  I wasn't on the East coast last year (I stood in line at Best Buy with The Man and my in-laws in the freezing cold for 3 or 4 hours last year).  My cousin is super excited that I'm here for Black Friday this year.  I'm super excited too.  Black Friday has made us many memories.  We'll probably head to Michael's Thanksgiving night, just cause we can.  We don't buy for tons of people any more but we have still continued our Black Friday Tradition.  I'm looking forward to the day when my neices join us...and hopefully someday a daughter!

Who Knew?

Back in the day, when I would think about the future and what my life would be like, I didn't think it would be like this.  It's so much better than I could have imagined.

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a doctor when I grew up.  An oncologist to be exact.  A pediatric oncologist.  This was largely influenced they the fact that my dad was diagnosed with cancer when I was in 3rd grade and again when I was in 7th grade.  At some point, I'm not sure when, I decided that I didn't want to be a doctor (probably when I realized  I would have to go to school for years).  I wanted to be a nurse for awhile and then not.   I don't remember what I wanted to be after that.  I do know that I wanted to have a career I enjoyed, a husband I loved and the most adorable kids ever.  I would be one of those women who had it all...career, husband, kids.  It would all be juggled amazing well and nothing would suffer.  I would be able to do it all and do it all well.  I  WOULD NOT, under any circumstances be staying at home.

Out of that scenario, I have a husband that I love.  Lots.  We don't have kids yet.  When they come along I'm sure they will be adorable.  How could they not be?    What I don't have is that career.  I did teach for 6ish years after I got out of college.  I enjoyed it.  I loved seeing the light bulb go off in their heads.  I just didn't want to be in the classroom for the rest of my life.

I'm loving being a stay at home wife.  I'm as surprised as the next person at this but I'm enjoying it.  I don't love cleaning but I love having a clean house for my husband to come home too.  I love having dinner ready for him to eat after working hard all day.  I love having the time to do crafty stuff and to be able to help others.  It's not what I ever imagined but it's wonderful.  I'm looking forward to the day when I'm staying home with our kids.  I love that my husband that supports me in whatever I want to do.  I'm blessed with a life I love.  What could be better than that?

What did you want to be when you grew up?  What is your job now?

The Big 3-0

Earlier this week my husband turned 30.  Yup, he's old.  Not that I'm one to talk, since I'm staring 31 in the face.

Birthday Breakfast

He took the day off and  he enjoyed sleeping in and then I made The Man breakfast.  He's the breakfast maker in our house so this was a bit of a stretch for me.  I was going to make waffles but we were out of milk so he got scrambled eggs with bacon, kielbasa and toast.

Birthday Presents

 Then he opened his presents.  He's hard to buy for so I ended getting him a few small things, like woodworking magazines, some drafting tools and a hammer.   I know a hammer sounds like a strange gift but he was looking for one a week ago and couldn't find one.  Now he has one!

The rest of the day was low key as we ran a few errands.   Since we don't know how often we'll be able to celebrate our birthdays together it was nice to have this one even if we didn't do anything big or special.  I like any day that I get to spend with my husband!

It's Friday!

Friday=Milspouse Friday Fill-In with Wifey. Head on over to check it out and link up!

1.  What is the silliest get-up you have ever worn outside of a Halloween party?  

I lived in China for a year after I graduated from college.  I was teaching English and the organization that I went with placed me on a team.  My team was AMAZING!  There were 6 of us, all women, all recently graduated from college. We spent a lot of time together and did some crazy things.  I submit the photos below as evidence of our silliness:

One night w e each chose a letter and had to dress in that letter and bring a dish starting with our chosen letter.  I was R.  I brought Rice Pudding and dressed in a robe and tied a rock to my head.

I'm showing off the rock that fell off my head.

We were bored and decided to have a tacky night.  This is what we came up with.

I was cold so I added on layers.

SARS happened while I was in China.  We were given some boring white masks to wear so found these cute ones to wear instead.

Are you tired of pictures yet?  I have one more for you.  All of the photos above were worn inside and not seen by the public.  The one to come...I would go out in public like this.  It was super cold out and I was more concerned about being warm than what I looked like!

Yes, I'm wearing two hats.

Which one do you think is the silliest?

2.  What is something that you gave up in order to live the military lifestyle?

This question really made me think.  When I consider my marriage and the life we have together, I tend to think of the things I've gained, not given up.  One thing that came to mind is I gave up living close to family & friends.  I didn't (and don't) agonize over that.  It wasn't a deal breaker.  More than one person commented that I least I was still in the US!  And there's always the chance we'll get stationed near them...Groton, CT isn't that far from where I grew up.  And yes, rotten Groton is high on our list of dream duty stations! 

Oh...I gave up my job as a technology education teacher.  But I was pink slipped and probably wasn't getting my job back.  I don't have another teaching job and I'm not looking for one.  I'm okay with not being in the classroom anymore.  So I don't see this as a negative either! 

I really want to go back to Angkor Wat!

3.  If money wasn’t a factor and you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be? And why?

I would go on a trip around the world.  I have a list of places to visit that is a mile long. Ireland, Luxembourg, Poland, Germany, Czech Republic, Turkey, Italy, Greece, Laos, Singapore, Thailand, Viet Nam, Cambodia, China, Japan, Tahiti, Barbados,  and Brazil are just a few of the places I'd like to go (or revisit!)   The why is a little harder, as each place has a different reason.  The simplest answer is that I love learning about other cultures and people.  If and when I get to go to these place, I'll want to spend some time in the tourist areas but I also like getting away from the tourists and seeing what the country is like for a native.  I hate feeling like a tourist.

4.  If you were going to join the military, what branch would you join? Or which MOS/rating would you choose?  

There's a reason why The Man is in the military and I'm not.  Joining the military has never appealed to me.  I think it has to do with the fact that when I was younger I always equated the military with running (you always see them running in the movies!) and I don't run.  I hate running and it hates me.  With a passion.  But IF I had to choose, I would probably join the Navy and be a diver. 

5.  What is your favorite thing to make for dinner?

Anything I can throw in the crock pot.  The Man thinks I'm too attached to it.  Some of my favorite recipes are from the website A Year of Slow Cooking.  I highly recommend the cream cheese chicken, the buffalo wing soup and the orange chicken.  I've made other recipes from here and they are all delicious.  You should bookmark the site and refer to it often!

I also tend to just throw stuff in the crock pot.  It always turns out good.  I don't like to follow recipes, something you may know if you've read any of my cooking related posts (I also don't like to follow directions!)  I'll often look at a recipe and then tweak it.  And I almost never measure.  That's why The Man does most of the baking:) 

Don't forget to head over to ACU’s, Stiletto Shoes, and Pretty Pink Tutus for the MilSpouse Friday Round Up! 

Granny

At Uncle Paul & Aunt Janet's Wedding

My mom called me this morning with the news that my grandma passed away.  While it wasn't expected it wasn't out of the blue either.  She hadn't been doing well.  Granny was recently moved into a nursing home because my Grandpa just couldn't take care of her anymore at home.  On top of being diabetic she was also suffering from Alzheimer's.  She didn't like taking her medicine and didn't like to eat, unless it was a milkshake.  Granny loved her milkshakes.  Apple turnovers too!

With Granny, October 2007

I haven't seen my grandparents since they moved to Arkansas from Massachusetts on 2007.  I might be a bad granddaughter for not seeing them in 3 years but the memories I have of Granny are of how she used to be and not what she was like now.

With my grandparents

The memories filling my head are from childhood.  As a child I loved to visit and spend time with my grandparents.  I'm not the oldest grandchild but I was the one that lived the closest for a while.  I remember walking to the corner store just about every day to pick up milk or cheese.  I remember eating eggs with fried bologna (cut up in Granny's special way and mixed together.  I've been trying for 15 years to cut it up the way she did and still haven't mastered it) or chocolate gravy for breakfast.  I remember eating creamed corn for dinner at their house.  I remember Granny calling me a ring tailed tooter.  I remember being excited that I was almost as tall as her...I was so exited when I finally was.  Granny was about 4'10" and I'm only about 5'2".  I remember twisting her rings on her fingers...and I remember the sound the insulin bottle would make and she rolled the small glass bottle between her hands to mix it up.  I remember her teasingly try to convince me to take her insulin shot for her.  I remember sitting out on the front porch and watching the world go by on Dot Ave.  I remember lots of hugs.  And lots of love.

My favorite picture of me with Granny

Thank you for being a wonderful, loving grandma.  I love and miss you.  I'm sad for me but am thankful that you are whole once again.

September 11

It's hard to believe that it's been 9 years since September 11, 2001.  It seems like so long ago and in some ways it seems like just yesterday.  I, like so many others, remember exactly what I was doing and what that day was like.

I was a senior in college.  I can easily recall feelings of shock, disbelief, sadness and fear.  I am proud and thankful to be an American.  I am proud of our military and the families that support them.  I am proud of our firefighters, police and EMTs and the families that support them.  I am thankful for those who are still fighting and for those who protect us every day and are ready to respond to any crisis.

I'm off to enjoy a sunny Saturday and some college football.  While I go about my day, I will be remembering 9 years ago.  I hope you will be too.